A Grain of Sand
[Luke 10:30-35 ESV]
Jesus replied, “A man was going down from Jerusalem to Jericho, and he fell among robbers, who stripped him and beat him and departed, leaving him half dead. Now by chance a priest was going down that road, and when he saw him he passed by on the other side. So likewise a Levite, when he came to the place and saw him, passed by on the other side. But a Samaritan, as he journeyed, came to where he was, and when he saw him, he had compassion. He went to him and bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he set him on his own animal and brought him to an inn and took care of him. ...
-----
As I've said before, I watch three kids. Now that school has started I only watch them after school. Yesterday, I only had to pick up the two girls from school because Brandon was at his dad's house. I had to pick them up, bring them home so Ada could do her homework, grab their overnight bags, and bring them to Lafayette to their mom and dad. They were strangely quiet and calm the whole ride there which I appreciated since I wasn't feeling that great. As we approached a red light on Evangline Throughway I noticed a man who I assume to be homeless standing on the side of the road holding a sign. He was standing to where the cars coming perpendicular to me were stopped so I couldn't see his sign. I just saw his side profile. Immediately I felt my heart break. I've always felt bad for the homeless people that I've seen before, but this was unlike anything I've felt before. I watched as car after car passed him by without even a second glance at him. I watched as one lady quickly turned her face away as she passed him and then when she was out of his sight began shaking her head in disapproval. I watched as car after car drove on without even a passing thought for that man. As my light turned green and I continued on I glanced back and looked at the man's face and all I saw was a hurting man that was desperate for a touch of compassion. As I drove away wth tears in my eyes I prayed for God to send someone to encourage him and to reveal Himself to him.
-----
As I continue to think about this man and everything I felt in that moment all I can feel now is thankfulness. I'm thankful that God had poured His compassion on me and that he has increased my ability to feel and show compassion to His children. I'm thankful that He has allowed me to look past myself and see those around me. Actually see them. How many times before have I drove past people or walked past people looking in the opposite direction because I didn't want to look them in the face? How many times have I drove off without even a thought as to who they are and what God says about them? What really amazes me is how many times I have felt bad or sorry for those people but never took the time to pray for them. I may not be able to give all the time. I may not be able to stop and talk to them. But, I always have time to pray for them. How many people have I looked at and never really seen?
-----
[Matthew 25:40 NIV]
"The King will reply, 'Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.'
Turning my eyes and heart away from the hurting is the same as turning away from Christ. He has called me to love people and to show them love. I don't want to pass people by and not be Jesus to them. I don't want to walk this earth and not in some way do something for others and fulfill my calling as a disciple.
-----
[Colossians 3:12 ESV]
Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy and beloved, compassionate hearts, kindness, humility, meekness, and patience,
A specific prayer of mine lately is that I would be gentle and I have prayed numerous scriptures over myself including Colossians 3:12. I have seen how God has moved in my heart and how He is daily giving me a heart that is more compassionate and gentle. I have watched my perspective change in great ways. I see myself react to things differently than I use to, and I see myself feeling things that I never use to feel.
-----
I am reminded of this picture God gave me two years ago. As I was praying for lost friends and family I had fallen on my knees and just began to weep. Then I saw a beach and I saw myself grab a handful of sand. As I stared at the thousands of grains of sand in my hand and watched them fall through my fingers I felt like God told me that my capacity to love and to hurt was one grain of sand. That if you were to measure what I felt and the desperation in my heart for the people I loved to know Christ it would be one grain of sand. Just one. But, God's desire for His children to know Him, and the pain He feels when they turn from Him is every single grain of sand in the entire world. That my level of compassion is one. His is all. My ability to love is measured by one. His is all.
I think about this often. Whenever my emotions are strong and the things I feel start to weigh heavy on my heart. I am always reminded that my capacity for any kind of feeling is limited. If I were to feel what God feels I would not be able to survive.
-----
Jesus's heart yearns for that man. Jesus's heart yearns for every man. Though Iwant freedom, blessings, and salvation for that man and every person I know, I will never want it as much as God does. But, I want to be able to love them with all of the ability I have. I want my one grain of sand to be filled with compassion. I want to love people and see people with everything I can.
I think we all should want that.